Depression has been the bane of my existence latly. Low energy, sadness, loss of interest in things that make me happy. There was even one week I could hardly get out of bed! I've also been experiencing suicidal of self harm thoughts, but no intention to act on them. They simply go in one ear and out the other, crossing my mind briefly. And so, thinking it was the right thing to do, I told my dad last night. What did he do? Turned it into a rant about my friends and calling their differences in orientation and I quote, "Serious Issues." Like good god man I'm telling you some very important things! So I went upstairs to my bed and stared at the ceiling silently crying and talking to a kid in my advisory who luckily was up until I passed out. Then woke up about four hours later and went to talk to Ms Suitor who was, luckily much more helpful. She had me talk to Miss Sarah, a psych intern in our advisory and she brought me to Dr. Szutch who is her boss and one of the Psychologists in Gateways. He is going to talk to Dr. Shea and ask how things are going and how to support me in an educational standpoint. Mr. Shattuck and Ms. Suitor, as well as my guidence counseler are involved as well. Though it's a work in progress hopefully it's the first step to getting out of this seemingly bottomless pit that my life is stuck in.
Have any input? Leave a comment is love to hear your ideas or thoughts.
Until next time,
Max
You got me out of my pit of despair; it's only fitting that I help you.
ReplyDeleteMy advice: Get through it just to be able to say "I got through it" and think of the people you'll be able to help due to your personal experience.
Thanks for the advice.
Delete"I've also been experiencing suicidal of self harm thoughts, but no intention to act on them. They simply go in one ear and out the other, crossing my mind briefly.
ReplyDeleteGood! [that they go from ear to ear like other thoughts do].
"So I went upstairs to my bed and stared at the ceiling silently crying and talking to a kid in my advisory who luckily was up until I passed out."
Glad to see your advisory is so approachable ... at any time of the day or night. And willing to listen.
"Then woke up about four hours later and went to talk to Ms Suitor who was, luckily much more helpful."
Yes, Ms Suitor has been and is helpful to you.
"She had me talk to Miss Sarah, a psych intern in our advisory and she brought me to Dr. Szutch who is her boss and one of the Psychologists in Gateways. He is going to talk to Dr. Shea and ask how things are going and how to support me in an educational standpoint. Mr. Shattuck and Ms. Suitor, as well as my guidence counseler are involved as well."
Great team work!
Are you people doing IDAHOT [the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia]? It is a day for all the people who are not safe and supported too.
Of course it takes hours for it to completly go away but eventually they leave.
DeleteYeah they're a pretty good group.
She's incredibly helpful.
My TEAM tends to be good at working together.
That's the first I've heard of such a day! It sounds very interesting.
I thought Raelyn might have said something about it this time last year. Or perhaps GLOW might have known about it from previous years.
Delete2017 called out to me because it was in a neighbourhood house.
Hope everyone stands up and pulls together.
Two more things [or maybe three]:
ReplyDeleteThing one! I have been reading MAD IN AMERICA's blog and there is a woman called Sera Davidow. She is part of the WestMass Recovery Learning Community.
Thing two! The Aces Carnival for bloggers runs every month or so. In recent times a Canadian friend, Ettina, has run it.
Thing three! I was searching around and noticed Teri Doolittle's words about "Careers in the Arts" which was done by a very cool programme called IdeaScale by PolicyWorks.
This was during June 2016 in the middle of that month.
It had cool people like Sharon Austin; Whitney Mohrhauser; France's Carner; Kitty Lunn of the Infinity Dance Theater; Dephinia [who wrote Isolated and Unsupported] and Meriah Nichols [who you might remember from various link-ups over the past two years] and Kojo Amissah.
Careers in the Arts - all the questions and stories involved
Cheers for Peers by Sera Davidow
False Arguments in Three Parts by Sera Davidow - Mad in America
Smash the Blue Light from May 2017
Asexual Agenda's writings for the Carnival of Aces
Current masterpost for the Carnival of Aces
Submitting to the May Carnival of Aces - the topic is kissing/handholding/bedsharing
A Carnival of Aces masterpost which has all the topics over time since 2011 until 2012
Mighty Max....
ReplyDeleteHere is my advice.... Fight as hard as humanly possible to continue doing the things, hobbies, and interests that you love. Writing? Drawing? Reading? Fight as hard as humanly possible to continue doing those things that bring you joy.... Especially on days when you're not in the mood. Because who knows? Getting lost in a fictional story, in a drawing, in a book, can be Lifesaving!! ;)
Hugs and prayers, dear Friend!! ;)
'Stay hard, stay hungry, stay alive', Raelyn
Thanks for the advice. I just finished colouring something. And I'm working on a few stories! Two of them are crossovers with Ender Chan and then another that's VERY long and hopefully you'll enjoy it, but I'm still going to be working on it for at least a week or two.
Delete