Survivor (Sarah)

 “Did I ever tell you why I left Valanwood in the first place?” I ask Everan as we sit at the table watching the people below on their late night walks home. “Multiple times, usually over drinks.” He says and takes a sip of his glass. “Why?” He then asks, setting it down. I shrug “No reason.” Everan shoots me a less than convinced look. I sigh “Fine, I’ve just been thinking about it lately. Did you hear what happened to Anna?” Ev sits back in his chair “Bits and pieces of it, yes. Not the entire story.” He explains nonchalantly. “Well, in summary, it’s not good but she’ll be fine in the long run...I hope, at least.” I say hesitantly toward the end. “Was she…” Ev begins to ask “No. Thankfully, no. But it was close.” I interrupt. Everan crosses his arms and frowns “Well that’s good but yet...not good.” I nod “certainly not ideal indeed, luckily she’s got thick skin, at least metaphorically. Literally may be another story.”

Everan and I often have chats like these, late at night over a bottle of wine while Phillip sleeps in the other room, or is off at his own home pouring over papers to be graded, Everan and I chat, reminisce, and occasionally have a good cry. Our pasts are very different, and yet in many ways they are quite similar. We are both survivors, however that may be defined within our circumstances of existence. Eventually it gets late enough that even the two of us get tired, and so I trod home, the darkness ever so slowly turning to light, and it makes me smile slightly.

I write myself a note and leave it by my bedside for when I wake up before getting ready for bed. Carmen sleeps like a rock and doesn’t notice me mulling about in the darkness or even the noise of the running shower water. As I stand in the steamy water my mind wanders a bit as I clean up. For a while after I left Valanwood, showering, and bathing in general was a tougher task than I’d normally admit. Seeing myself unclothed brought up thoughts and emotions I was unable to coherently process then, and even now I still avoid dwelling on them. My mind then wanders back to Anna, I wonder what she thinks while alone in the shower, as odd of a thought it must sound like. After all, her body in many places does have faint, but extensive scarring from years of pokes and prods. I remind myself of the note I left on the table to pay her a visit tomorrow.

I sleep later than intended, and am awoken by a pillow hitting my face and a window opening “Wake up kiddo rise and shine it’s nearly noon.” It’s Maddie, Carmen’s sister. “I’m only three years younger than you know.” Maddie nods “And thus so you classify as kiddo, now up you get.” With a sign and a groan I sit up “Where’s Carmen?” I ask fixing my hair so it’s slightly more in its usual style “She had to meet Lani for something this morning, she’ll be back by dinner.” Maddie then notices the note on the table “What’s this? ‘See Anna, check in about recent event.’ What event?” I hesitate for a moment “Classified information, can’t tell you.” A bit of a code the two of us came up with regarding sensitive information or topics, a sign to not press further, and if possible ask the original person what’s going on.  Maddie puts the note down, understanding “Alright then...Wish her well from us if you can.” I nod “If I can actually talk to her that is, we’ll find out.”

I dress quickly, and grab breakfast, or really more like brunch, on my way. Eventually I get to proudspire manor, their townhouse in Solitude. I find Sofie and Runa running around with a couple of the other local children throughout the neighborhood “Is your mum home?” I ask Sofie, who nods “Yeah but she’s not feeling well papa said, so we’re staying with the neighbors for a few days.” I look at the house, what Farkas had said to them is true in a sense, and probably for the best. “Want to play tag?” Sofie asks after a few minutes silence. “I can’t right now, though thanks for asking. Perhaps later?” Satisfied with the answer Sofie runs off to join her friends once more.

“Anna? Farkas? Anyone home?” I ask knocking on the door. Farkas opens the door “Oh, hi Sarah. Didn’t expect to see you here...what are you doing here?” I sigh softly “I heard what happened, and thought I’d might as well check in.” He lets me inside and closes the door behind us “I had actually thought about calling you, as afterall, in a sorry way you do have the most experience with this out of all of us.” I laugh slightly “You’re not wrong.” After a brief cup of tea and some catching up we turn to more serious matters…

“So, what happened anyways? I haven’t heard the entire story.” He shrugs “To be honest I don’t have the entire story either, the best people to ask would be Valan, Issy, or Yuuri, or Teldryn Sero If you know him by any chance.” He recounts what he knows, most of the basics with some details I hadn’t yet heard. “The most problematic part of this is regression. She won’t talk, won’t eat, and won’t drink. She just sleeps, and cries, and wants to be held until she doesn’t and it just repeats. Yuuri said it could go on for at least another few days, there’s been little improvements since at first, but she’s still not herself. Currently she’s napping.” That sounds exhausting, to say the very least. “When she’s awake again, do you mind if I talk to her?” Farkas nods “She might not say much back but she’s entirely with it from a receptive standpoint so sure, it might help actually to have someone who understands on a personal level what’s going on.” My thoughts exactly. Survivor to survivor.